I have a new hero. His name is Franklin P. Jones. If he were alive today I’d adopt him as my grandpa.
Mr. Jones wrote a column called “Put It This Way” for the Saturday Evening Post during the 1940’s and ’50’s. (Anyone who wrote for the post during the same period that Norman Rockwell was doing their covers is aces in my book. But that’s another post.)
(I mean seriously. Look at that: )
Jones was a brilliant paragrapher: someone who condenses thoughts or humor into paragraph form. He started out as a police reporter and rose through the ranks to feature writer, newspaper editorial board member, director of publicity for an ad agency, and head of a 40-man ad team.
When he retired he became a humorist, and by the end of his life had written more than 35,000 paragraphs, gag lines, epigrams, definitions, and anecdotes. And it was all to make people laugh.
That’s why he’s my hero. Check him out:
“The only thing that will really prevent baldness is hair.”
“The only problem with having nothing to do is you can’t stop and rest.”
“A fanatic is one who sticks to his guns whether they’re loaded or not.”
“All women should know how to take care of children. Most of them will have a husband someday.”
“Honest criticism is hard to take, especially from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance or a stranger.”
“Love doesn’t make the world go ’round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.”
“The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it.”
And finally:
“One advantage of talking to yourself is that you know at least somebody’s listening.”
Yeah, Franklin. I’m with you on that one.
Oh, the '50's seem so magical to everyone except those living through them. I have a new favorite paragrapher, thanks to you.
Weren't they though?
I know. This guy said the best things.